Spokane Food Blog

As you may or may not know, tonight is the first episode of Top Chef: New York on Bravo. At 8pm, no less than 17 chefs will face off in the Quickfire Challenge and the grander Elimination Challenge. It’ll be entertainment central, yo.

Who will win? Who will be laughed out? Who will be the douchebag to out-douche season two’s Marcel? With only Bravo’s propaganda to go by, it’s difficult to say, but here’s an early opinion:

The Potential Winners!

Alex: Executive chef, Restaurant 15, LA

His mug suggests he might just win the Douchebag award, yet you can’t argue with the man’s taste and credentials, at least when the context of a reality television program is taken into consideration. Having a vast international background — landing in LA by the way of Madrid, the Dominican Republic, and NYC — suggests he can be versatile in the kitchen while having a spicy enough personality for the producers to want to keep him around. His love for a good duck confit and paella makes him an interesting pick for me personally.

Fabio: Owner, Cafe Firenze Italian Restaurant & Martini Bar, Moorpark, CA

Fabio, a born and bred Italian, has the authentic Mediterranean cuisine down pretty well if his bio is anything to go by. In fact, looking at his restaurant’s menu, which I assume is his seeing he is the owner, Fabio is somebody who enjoys simple and clean flavors. This tends be a favorite quality for the judges. Of course, Fabio’s also a good looking man, which isn’t going to hurt his chances

Jamie: Executive Chef, Absinthe Brasserie and Bar, San Francisco

It’s hard to say if Absinthe seems so prolific just because of the easy to remember name or if it has an actual good buzz about it. Regardless, Absinthe’s menu looks impressive without being overly complicated, and Jamie’s CIA credentials would indicate she knows what she’s doing. Judging by her tattoos and posture, I’m also going to guess she has spunk, which is very television friendly. Who doesn’t love a spark plug?

The Potential Loser!

Carla: Owner/Chef, Alchemy Caterers, DC

While about half the contestants are, shall we say, uninspiring, I can’t help but feel that Carla encompasses all the less than stellar qualities of the Top Chefs. On top of the pile is her catering background. With all respect to caterers far and wide, I have seen few interesting caterer contestants. Remember Betty from season two? Her sparkly personality overshadowed her dull creations, and pulled her through further than she should have gone. She was also the same age as Carla.

In other words, I don’t think Carla will be the first to go. But that doesn’t mean she’s not The Loser in this competition.

The Potential Douchebag!

Patrick: Culinary student, NY

First, I’m fairly certain he might have his eyebrows waxed, which, unless he is in the middle of a reassignment process, does not inspire confidence. Other than that, the tie, his posture, his… Well, just look at the bio… My prediction is that he’ll be an overly cocky student who thinks he knows better than the judges, and will be kept in for quite a while to keep the program “colorful.” Outside of that, I have little reason to believe he’ll cook up anything too interesting.

The Stefaning!

Stefan: Chef, StefansCatering.com, Santa Monica

Yeah, I got little to add here, other than this will be the man who will unleash The Stefaning all over everybody’s faces! My personal favorite in the competition.